I thought I’d post my Christmas letter for all of my fellow Internets just in case I was too cheap to send you the real deal. Don’t hate, appreciate?
Hey there, my little elves.
At first, I was going to write a really stellar Christmas letter but then decided against it because in truth, Zack and I are terribly boring. Later on though, I panicked and decided to write one anyway (just a letter, not a stellar one) because I was worried you might Think we are boring, which is way worse than only Being boring. So, here we are. Please, everyone stay calm, we’ll get through this together.
Since basically nothing noteworthy has happened to us this year, how about I tell you what we DID NOT do in 2010? That was a rhetorical question so your answers were ignored. Sorry, we have to keep moving or we’ll never arrive safely at the end of this holiday hogwash.
We didn’t sell our townhome, even though it was on the market for 5 very sad and inconvenient months. I think it’s because the linoleum eyesore was just too much for anyone to take and I can’t say I blame them, my dreams are often haunted by it.
Zack’s BDPA students didn’t win 2nd place at the National Competition (they won first).
We didn’t have a baby or get a dog or buy a new car. I did pick up a very cute sweater on clearance last weekend though, so there’s that.
We didn’t travel to any beautiful beaches or go on some adventurous, grand vacation. Instead, we road tripped to Michigan to ambush friends for a few days this summer and spent the rest of the year playing an embarrassing amount of rummy and salivating over the Food Network.
We didn’t win the lottery and quit our jobs so I could pursue yoga and napping full time and Zack could finally become an official coffee connoisseur. Instead, I still work for a Fancy Computer Company building chips that could save the world (no, that’s not true) and Zack works from home, avoiding the laundry that piles up, on his funeral software company that won’t save the world either, but helps out dead people.
I didn’t write any important manuscripts, pen a sweet children’s book, or lend my signature for a fancy celebrity auction. Instead, I started a blog so I could publish my nonsense on the Internet, in hopes that my future grandchildren will use it against me later.
I hope you have a wonderful and drama free holiday. I also hope you eat more than you should and love as much as you can, because that’s what life (even a boring one) is all about.
Zack & (the)Candace
P.S. If you want to see the Christmas card that accompanied this letter, check it out HERE. It has very pretty pictures.